That’s how I feel sometimes. Like there’s too many fish in the sea. Also, I hate that metaphor. Why are we compared to fish? Anyway, that’s besides the point. I feel lately like there’s too many people to choose from. People keep coming in and out of my life and I’m so stressed about it. Will he stay? Will he leave again? Is he going to come back like the others did? I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like love just isn’t for me. I’ve gotten so comfortable with being alone that the idea of being with someone just seems so unappealing to me. But I’ll have thee moments where all I want is for someone to keep me company and all I want to do is love someone so much it hurts. I hate that.
Recently, I had met this guy who was everything I wanted. He was in a popular band, he was weird (in a good way), he made me think, he made me so happy. And then once I met him (yes, we met through social media and I’m a hopeless romantic so I was super into that idea) I liked him even more. And it SEEMED that he did too. And I kept thinking to myself, “Wow, finally. I met someone who can make me unafraid to love.” But then after we met and had a very intimate night, he never spoke to me again. He was gone. Just like that. I realized he didn’t have the same intentions as me. I was let down, yet again. It hurt pretty bad. And I miss that feeling he gave me.
Now I’m talking to someone I’ve known for a few years and we hit it off but I don’t have that same feeling, ya know? I just hate all these damn fishes. Do you ever feel that way? I really hope so.